Because we're women..................

Because women's work is never done and is underpaid or unpaid or boring or repetitious and we're the first to get the sack and what we look like is more important than what we do and if we get raped it's our fault and if we get bashed we must have provoked it and if we raise our voices we're nagging bitches and if we enjoy sex we're nyphos and if we don't we're frigid and if we love women it's because we can't get a "real man" and if we ask our doctors too many questions we're neurotic and/or pushy and if we expect community care for our children we're selfish and if we stand up for our rights we're aggresive and "unfeminine" and if we don't we're typical weak females and if we want to get married we're out to trap a man and if we don't we're unnatural and because we still cannot get a safe contraceptive but men can walk on the moon and we can't cope or don't want a pregnancy we're made to feel guilty about abortion and.... For lots and lots of other reasons we are part of the womens liberation movement. Joyce Stevens, Womens Liberation Broadsheet, International women's Day, 1975.

Thirty years on this piece remains as one of the icons of the women's lib movement, some of it still stands true today. I have had this piece for many years, it has been inside the cover of every school diary since I was given it when I was 14, it has been confiscated many a time by teachers who thought it wrong for it to be my personal mantra and guide. I had copies, lots of them. It has been framed in every workplace I ever slaved in and on the wall of all my offices. Given the questions now raised by women who believe they were "mislead" by their mothers about "having it all"..I had to resurrect this piece; given that it was my personal life guide; to see if it really affect my ability to "have it all" or at least my concept of having it all.
Yes I worked in male dominated workplaces where the "old boy" school reigned, but you don't have to be one of them to beat them. I worked in totally male oreintated fields such as insurance and vehicle repair...Many a contractor entered my office enquiring "where's the boss, love" or a solicitor would ask for the manager ( THAT WOULD BE ME, IDIOT) I reveled in their embarrassment and quite enjoyed my discussions about repair techniques etc. As far as "trapping" a man, well boy meets girl, both agree its not really heavy..no joint bank accounts etc and four years later boy asks girl to marry him...laws of nature. I don't expect community care for my children I have the option to stay at home and care for them, but many do not.. and until ALL the businesses of this society get their arses into gear and realise the untapped potential in all women and create some adaptive workplace practices in regards to hours and subsidised childcare, they that do not; are only missing out on the rewards. Women have freedom of choice even if that means the choosing to follow a religious creed which directs you to remain answerable to your husband/partner/significant other as long as that choice is made without duress or pressure, it remains their choice. As is with abortion, religious zealots aside; it is a personal choice made by that person (and perhaps their partner) for their own personal reasons..no one should interfere. I cannot claim to ever understand what it would be like to tetter on the edge of such a decision and think they that do, deserve others respect for their wishes..it cannot be an easy decision.
I think the concept of "having it all" a personal one...is to "have it all" to have it all at the same time...fulltime work, children, family life...it's really hard. I don't think our mothers and the libbers of the '70's lied to us ..they gave us the means by which to make the decisions so that we could "have it all" but perhaps they did not mean all at once... do the career thing,have the family, do the kid raising thing, change careers to suit the family dynamics, whatever. But no one was ever meant to have it all at once. We owe a lot to the pioneers of women's rights....they suffered the slings and arrows to make it easier for us...the fact that some think it made it harder is a fallacy created by their own inabilities to see the creed as many shades of grey and not just back and white.